Should I Do a First Look? | First Look vs. Traditional Ceremony

When it comes to planning your wedding, one of the biggest questions couples face is: Should we do a first look? Or should we stick to the more traditional route of seeing each other for the first time at the ceremony?

As a wedding photographer who has captured over 400 weddings, I can tell you this—there is no right or wrong answer. Your wedding day is deeply personal, and your timeline should reflect what feels meaningful and authentic to you.

But if you’re still feeling stuck on the decision, let’s walk through both sides. I’m here to help you feel confident in whatever choice you make—whether it’s a private first look or the traditional walk down the aisle moment.

What Is a First Look?

A first look is when the couple chooses to see each other privately before the ceremony. This often intimate moment is usually captured by your photographer and offers space to connect, laugh, or share a few tears together without the crowd of guests watching.

It’s become increasingly popular over the past few years—and for good reason! But that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone.

First Look Pros

A Quiet, Meaningful Moment Together

Wedding days move fast, and everyone wants a piece of your attention. A first look gives you a private moment to connect with your partner before the whirlwind begins. It’s often one of the only times you’ll be alone together all day—and that time is priceless.

Helps the Timeline Flow

Doing a first look opens up your schedule. You can knock out couple portraits, wedding party photos, and even some family photos before the ceremony, which gives you more flexibility later in the day—especially helpful for winter weddings or tight timelines.

It can also give you the gift of joining your cocktail hour—more time with your guests and more photos with better lighting earlier in the day.

Eases the Nerves

Many couples say seeing their partner before the ceremony helped calm their nerves. Whether it’s a big hug, a deep breath, or just hearing each other’s voices, this emotional reset can ground you both before the big moment.

Bonus: if you’re a tearful type, doing a first look gives you time to touch up makeup before walking down the aisle.

More Flexibility if It Rains

A first look also acts like a built-in rain plan. If the forecast calls for showers, it gives us more flexibility to sneak outside when there’s a break in the rain.  Most of the time if it is going to rain it will not rain all day.  Rainy wedding days are beautiful—some of my favorite photos have come from those soft, romantic rainy moments. Please note if you have a brake in the rain or not – I always encourage my couples to embrace it and step out for at least a few portraits. You will not regret it!

First Look Cons

Breaking Tradition

If you’ve always dreamed of locking eyes at the altar for the first time, then the traditional route may be best for you. For some couples, holding off on that moment until the ceremony keeps the anticipation and emotional impact intact.

Expectations vs. Reality

Let’s be honest—first looks can come with pressure. You might have seen emotional reactions online and worry about whether your partner will cry or gasp. But every couple is different! The beauty of a first look lies in whatever moment unfolds naturally. It doesn’t have to be dramatic to be meaningful.

I step back with a long lens and let the moment be real—not staged. I also recommend keeping this moment private—just the two of you.

You’ll Need to Be Ready Earlier

Depending on your ceremony time, a first look can shift your getting-ready timeline earlier. This means an earlier start for hair and makeup, and sometimes lighting isn’t ideal depending on the season. Your photographer can help you weigh the options!

Important Things to Consider

Sunset Time

Whether you’re doing a first look or not, be sure to check sunset time. If your formal photos happen after the ceremony, you’ll want to make sure there’s enough daylight left for those important shots.

Receiving Lines

If you plan to do a receiving line, keep in mind they can take up a large portion of cocktail hour. If photos are important to you, a first look may be a great way to ensure you don’t lose photo time.

Travel Time

Don’t forget to account for travel time between locations—plus traffic. It’s easy to underestimate how long it takes to get from getting ready to the ceremony or from the ceremony to photo spots.

You Call the Shots

You don’t have to do everything before the ceremony. Some couples prefer to do just their couple portraits and save family photos for cocktail hour to keep the first look more private. It’s totally up to you.

The Best of Both Worlds

Worried a first look might take away from that walk down the aisle? I promise—it won’t. After photographing hundreds of weddings (and from my own!), I can tell you the emotions still hit just as hard. Many couples cry again during the ceremony even after a first look, because they’ve had time to calm their nerves and fully feel the moment. First looks help you feel grounded—so when you do lock eyes at the altar, you’re not overwhelmed, you’re present.

First Look Alternatives

Still unsure? You’ve got options.

First Touch

You and your partner hold hands around a corner or blindfolded, so you can share a few words or a prayer without seeing each other. It’s a great way to calm nerves and still keep the surprise for the aisle.

Parent or Wedding Party Reveal

Let your bridal party or a parent see you in your dress first. These emotional moments can be incredibly special—and they make for some tearjerker photos!

Post-Ceremony Break

If you want to stick with tradition but still want more photo time, consider a longer break between ceremony and reception or a longer cocktail hour. This gives you a buffer for relaxed portraits without skipping any celebration.

So… Should You Do a First Look?

Here’s the truth: There’s no wrong answer.

Whether you choose a first look or wait until the aisle, your day is going to be amazing. The moment you see each other will be filled with emotion, love, and excitement—no matter when it happens.

When you book with Alicia Petitti Photography, we’ll talk through all your timeline options and help you decide what fits best with your vision, season, lighting, and priorities.

Still in the planning phase? Let’s connect—I’d love to help you create a photo timeline that fits you.